I was really able to relate to this article. I too was a family doctor but I truly enjoyed the patient interaction, and I was good at it as well. At mid career I often thought retirement would be difficult because of all the articles describing how difficult it was.
But for the last ten years of my career we joined a corporate practice I truly hated. It was obvious that money and ratings were their priority. I came to despise coming to clinic because there was no control over the non-stop torrent of work. I am reminded of a line by Morgan Housel that is something like: Doing something you love on someone else's schedule can feel just like doing something you hate.
When I retired it was because I needed time to take care of disabled family members. I think I have become quite good at this as well. That has really given me a renewed purpose in life which has been surprisingly positive. Three years in and I have no regrets over my choice. While I do miss taking care of my patients (I worked for over 40 years) working for a modern corporate practice negated that almost totally.
The thing I keep getting stuck on is that "front-load the sacrifice" only works as a story if you make it out. The people who burned out at 45 and never recovered told themselves the same thing at 35. You can't know which one you are while you're in it. That's the part I find hard, not the work itself.
It’s a topic I talk about frequently with my co-workers who vary in age from 30 to 65 when they are forced to retire. I’m especially drawn to those who have great friendships, and family relationships as they approach mandatory retirement. Inevitably, they have over the years found great purpose in many things, including their work, but used it as a means of creating a meaningful, flourishing life. But, they are the ones who never pushed so hard at work it became the main scaffolding for their ego, self-worth, and fulfillment.
Another thing worth mentioning is that I think we’ve just completely lost any sense of perspective. For most of human history, men did what their fathers did, women worked hard at home. Death lurked everywhere.
Even today, poverty is far more common than plenty. An example of a good story of upward mobility in India or Indonesia is a driver who works 16 hrs per day to ensure his kids finish high school.
How I’ve always thought of purpose and work is that we don’t need to be passionate about the thing we’re doing, but we can look for something within that context that feels purposeful. Like investing ourselves in people, somehow.
The art of subtraction is the piece that struck me. Most people approaching retirement are asking “what will I do next?” when the more useful question is exactly yours, what didn’t fit, and what does that tell me about what will? The toolkit doesn’t disappear when the career ends. It just needs a new context. That reframe changes everything about how you enter retirement.
I was really able to relate to this article. I too was a family doctor but I truly enjoyed the patient interaction, and I was good at it as well. At mid career I often thought retirement would be difficult because of all the articles describing how difficult it was.
But for the last ten years of my career we joined a corporate practice I truly hated. It was obvious that money and ratings were their priority. I came to despise coming to clinic because there was no control over the non-stop torrent of work. I am reminded of a line by Morgan Housel that is something like: Doing something you love on someone else's schedule can feel just like doing something you hate.
When I retired it was because I needed time to take care of disabled family members. I think I have become quite good at this as well. That has really given me a renewed purpose in life which has been surprisingly positive. Three years in and I have no regrets over my choice. While I do miss taking care of my patients (I worked for over 40 years) working for a modern corporate practice negated that almost totally.
The thing I keep getting stuck on is that "front-load the sacrifice" only works as a story if you make it out. The people who burned out at 45 and never recovered told themselves the same thing at 35. You can't know which one you are while you're in it. That's the part I find hard, not the work itself.
It’s a topic I talk about frequently with my co-workers who vary in age from 30 to 65 when they are forced to retire. I’m especially drawn to those who have great friendships, and family relationships as they approach mandatory retirement. Inevitably, they have over the years found great purpose in many things, including their work, but used it as a means of creating a meaningful, flourishing life. But, they are the ones who never pushed so hard at work it became the main scaffolding for their ego, self-worth, and fulfillment.
Great thoughts.
Another thing worth mentioning is that I think we’ve just completely lost any sense of perspective. For most of human history, men did what their fathers did, women worked hard at home. Death lurked everywhere.
Even today, poverty is far more common than plenty. An example of a good story of upward mobility in India or Indonesia is a driver who works 16 hrs per day to ensure his kids finish high school.
How I’ve always thought of purpose and work is that we don’t need to be passionate about the thing we’re doing, but we can look for something within that context that feels purposeful. Like investing ourselves in people, somehow.
The art of subtraction is the piece that struck me. Most people approaching retirement are asking “what will I do next?” when the more useful question is exactly yours, what didn’t fit, and what does that tell me about what will? The toolkit doesn’t disappear when the career ends. It just needs a new context. That reframe changes everything about how you enter retirement.
trust the process and trust yourself.